Волшебное на ebay.
Mar. 31st, 2006 08:39 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
koalenaPRESERVING THE DEAD
"Imagine the admiration and accolades you'll receive at the next party you attend when you casually announce that your new hobby is embalming corpses! Imagine their wonderment when you describe how a real body cavity search is performed! And imagine how proud you'll be to announce that you no longer drink highlands single-malt scotch, that you've switch to formaldehyde and tonic!
Here you get the best parts of two turn-of the-century undertaking books. We threw out the countless pages of anatomy that an embalmer certainly must know and retained only the "goodies".
You get fascinating history on corpse preservation from the Egyptians until these books were written in 1900 and 1908. Then you learn about the blood and how to extract it from veins, arteries and heart. Next comes the fun! You hook your dearly departed up to the 500 gpm pump and shoot him full of embalming fluid. You'll learn what arteries to use, and what cavities to fill. You'll be told where to make the incisions, how to push fluid up his nose, and even where to pack the m80s... well, maybe not.
The best part, I think is not the embalming process, but the funeral traditions. Undertakers are advised to wear clean clothes to a funeral (I guess the living should smell better than the dead), not to drink whiskey before the service (enough of the mourners will be doing that), and on how to keep different fraternities attending the rites in the deceased's home from getting into fistfights.
You aint gonna find this book at the local newstand. Give one of these to your mother-in-law. Leave one in a church pew. Flash one of these at the funeral director next time there's a death in the family and tell him to come down on his rates or you'll do the job yourself!
Great book. Off the wall. Great reading. Great gift. If you try the techniques presented, I don't want to know about it."
Автор текста ohojim
К моему великому сожалению, книгу уже купили.
funny, 
books, 
ebay
"Imagine the admiration and accolades you'll receive at the next party you attend when you casually announce that your new hobby is embalming corpses! Imagine their wonderment when you describe how a real body cavity search is performed! And imagine how proud you'll be to announce that you no longer drink highlands single-malt scotch, that you've switch to formaldehyde and tonic!
Here you get the best parts of two turn-of the-century undertaking books. We threw out the countless pages of anatomy that an embalmer certainly must know and retained only the "goodies".
You get fascinating history on corpse preservation from the Egyptians until these books were written in 1900 and 1908. Then you learn about the blood and how to extract it from veins, arteries and heart. Next comes the fun! You hook your dearly departed up to the 500 gpm pump and shoot him full of embalming fluid. You'll learn what arteries to use, and what cavities to fill. You'll be told where to make the incisions, how to push fluid up his nose, and even where to pack the m80s... well, maybe not.
The best part, I think is not the embalming process, but the funeral traditions. Undertakers are advised to wear clean clothes to a funeral (I guess the living should smell better than the dead), not to drink whiskey before the service (enough of the mourners will be doing that), and on how to keep different fraternities attending the rites in the deceased's home from getting into fistfights.
You aint gonna find this book at the local newstand. Give one of these to your mother-in-law. Leave one in a church pew. Flash one of these at the funeral director next time there's a death in the family and tell him to come down on his rates or you'll do the job yourself!
Great book. Off the wall. Great reading. Great gift. If you try the techniques presented, I don't want to know about it."
Автор текста ohojim
К моему великому сожалению, книгу уже купили.
funny, books, ebay
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2006-03-31 07:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-31 07:09 am (UTC)но мне весь текст нравится. :)
no subject
Date: 2006-03-31 12:13 pm (UTC)Странно, что автор рецензии не хочет ничего знать о личном опыте читателей, воодушевленных прочитанным и попробовавших "техники" на практике)
no subject
Date: 2006-03-31 12:16 pm (UTC)